Why Are We Here?
by Aria Breuer
Summary: The Fellowship of the Ring end up in group therapy with Hermione Granger. Only Frodo Baggins and his friends cannot help but disrupt the session. Alternate Universe.


**Disclaimers:** All canon material from The Lord of the Rings and other works related to Middle-earth belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. All other canon material belongs to their respected owners. I only own the plot, original characters, etc. for this fanfiction story.

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Once again, I'm at it with the Fellowship of the Ring in therapy. But this is a group therapy chapter. So, we'll see how it turns out. :)

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Frodo Baggins did not often read magazines. But this woodworking guide wasn't half bad. It even had some pictures of horses that Merry Brandybuck, his cousin, enjoyed reading… apart from boating. But Frodo didn't mind. No! He was prepared for what was coming next.

And into the next room he went. Only it was a large room, and half of the Fellowship of the Ring was present. He jumped in shock to see Boromir over by the food table. Quietly, he took some dessert, as he had luncheon before he came to this facility.

"Boromir," Frodo said. He dared ask the Gondorian soldier, "How are you here? I thought you… well, were slain in battle."

"It's a long story…" Boromir was impressed. "Well, you're no longer a little hobbit. How are you this tall?"

"It's a long tale. To put it simply, the moment I passed through a portal, it changed my height, but not my appearance." Frodo admitted. "I just look different is all."

"Let's start this therapy session, everyone! Gather your chairs in a half circle, please," It was Hermione Granger. Frodo heard of the bushy haired witch, but he was surprised that she was in charge of this therapy session.

"Did I miss something? How is a woman teaching therapy class?" Pippin Took asked, slugging Merry.

"Pay attention!" Hermione shouted. That stunned Frodo, Merry and Pippin.

"Easy," Sam Gamgee said, calming her down. "We haven't started this session yet."

"Well, I'm in charge until Harry returns," Hermione said.

"Harry? Harry who? Harry from Bree-land, Harry?" Pippin asked.

"Just sit down," Hermione said. Frodo whistled in surprise. He hadn't expected Hermione to have such brutal force. Still, he sat next to Sam, Aragorn, Gandalf, and Gimli to the right of Hermione, while Merry, Pippin, Boromir and Legolas sat on Hermione's left side. Hermione was ready for the group session, but a few hobbits weren't so fortunate. "Hello and welcome to the fourth week of group therapy. This session is on a very important topic: trusting each other."

Merry sobbed uncontrollably. Whether he was doing this for attention or, on the upside, he really was upset remained to be seen. Hermione continued on without him,

"Oh come on." Hermione said, stern in the face. "We've been over this before. Trust is very important in a fellowship." Frodo raised his hand, a curious smirk on his face. Hermione pointed to him, "Yes Frodo. What is your question?"

"Yeah, that's what I wondered." Frodo asked, "Which fellowship are we discussing? Your fellowship, my fellowship, or just…"

"How about a fellowship combined with elves and dwarf powers?" Gimli protested, shouting his full head off, "Yeah! Dwarves rule!"

"That's not true, friend dwarf," Legolas said, protesting against Gimli's protest. "There are many tales, many lines, that a fellowship can waltz into."

"Do you mean like the conspiracy group Merry, Sam and Fredegar were a part of?" Pippin asked. Frodo groaned.

"That was a conspiracy in the making, Pippin, and you know it!" Frodo cried, frustrated and annoyed, all in the same instance.

"All right!" Hermione said, keeping her composure calm. "There's no need to fight. Everybody just relax."

"Hey, when's the beer party starting up?" Merry asked, aloud.

"I believe it's on -" Pippin counted the days with his fingers, "Monday." He added, chirping up. "Hey, why don't we start our beer party now?" At which, most of the Fellowship nodded, chanting in agreement.

"I do love a good drinking game," Gimli said, overjoyed.

"Can we please focus on your treatments?" Hermione said, tense.

"I thought we were discussing about having a beer fest," Gimli said.

"What are we treating?" Merry asked, jokingly.

"Hmm…" Pippin grunted in mild enthusiasm. He murmured to Merry, "I think we were discussing our treatments. Not that I'm saying anything."

"Which makes me ask: what are we being treated for? Snacks? Wine?" Merry gave it some thought. "Wine is good. My Da makes the best apple cider and teacakes."

"Can we please get back on track here?" Hermione said, frustrated.

"Why Hermione?" Frodo and Pippin said at the same time.

"I thought you wanted us to have a treatment," Frodo said.

"What are we treating?" Merry and Pippin asked.

-.-.-

Hermione closed the door behind her. As she turned around, she was met by Harry Potter and Ron Weasley. She sighed in relief, happy to see the two but flustered by what she just experienced.

"Why Hermione," Harry said, "You look like a mess."

"Did the Fellowship of the Ring get you into trouble?" Ron said.

"No. They're just so… grrr!" Hermione whispered, "Could you two help me with them? I was trying to write up their treatment cards, but… oh."

"You just need to talk to them in the right way. Watch," Ron said, opening the door. He shouted aloud, "Drinks for everyone!"

"Yeah! Hooray!" The Fellowship of the Ring chanted.

"Keep your voices down," Gandalf huffed, clearly annoyed.

"See. That's all you need to do, Hermione," Harry said, smiling her way.

"Just work with them," Hermione said, passing to Harry and Ron the Fellowship's folders. She walked away, glad that things were being taken care off. Unaware to her, Harry and Ron gave the Fellowship what they wanted: good food, laughter and merriment. It was quite an exciting time to be a part of the Fellowship of the Ring.

It certainly was worth the effort.

The End.

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 **This group therapy story was first sparked by me and my friends ValueMyHeart and SweetDarkSilence. So I thank them for helping this story come along. And thank you, readers, for reading this work. It is much appreciated. :) I'll see everyone in the next story. :D**


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